HOW SOME LATINO WOMEN REACT IN THE ABSENCE OF MACHISMO
Being Cuban I can only make observations first hand of some things that I am familiar with in my culture. How Cuban women are looked upon, how they behave and that is limited to one country…I have observed that some other countries in Latin America suffer from the same frailties.
The prevalent misconception is that Cuban men are machistas; that may be the biggest error of perception in my opinion because Cuban men for the most part try to project an Alpha male image but deep down they succumb to the pressures of a matriarchal society. It happens at a very early age when their mothers using all the weapons at their disposal; manipulate and dominate their sons. 
One of the most common weapons in their arsenal is guilt…it surpasses Jewish guilt by a mile; Cuban women; particularly mothers have perfected the practice to an art. I will give you some examples: my mom, who is now close to 95 years old, gave me two shirts for my birthday. I put one on and she sees me in it. She promptly said: “Oh, I see you are wearing the shirt I gave you as a birthday gift…what’s the matter, you didn’t like the other one?” Or when she was living by herself, I had to visit someone in the neighborhood and she found out. “I heard you came to see Aurea and yet you didn’t come by to see me…what is it? You don’t love me anymore?”
Model Daniel David McKee looks Cuban and is very handsome
Women of her generation of course were a lot more abused and had to endure a place in a very repressive society. The first time my mother voted in Cuba was also the first time all women were able to vote in my country. They indeed had a second class status and yet many worked outside of the home and brought home the bacon. My mother goes on and on about how she worked so hard, had it so difficult and I am sure that those years during the Great Depression were indeed difficult for her…but then again they were hard for everyone. My mom takes on the “victim” to make people feel sorry for her and what she says she went through in those hard times. The juxtaposition of women in Cuban society is interesting because it is similar to the way Cubans view the Virgin Mary. As the mother of Jesus, she has a very special place in that religious faith…she is venerated and worshiped in an altar in one of the highest pedestals. So are Cuban women…mothers are to be worshiped like one does the Virgin Mary.
With younger women, those of my generation and younger, the story is a little different. Because women have gained an almost equal status they also tend to overcompensate and go beyond the boundaries of role playing. When Cuban men don’t exert their macho dominance these women, not all tend to misinterpret that to mean that their man is weak, a loser and someone not desirable. They bombard the men with criticism, humiliation and belittling statements in order to gain their own validation.
In my opinion, Cuban women have not yet been able to adapt to a new found equal role in our society. There are many who are so manipulative and control freaks that it becomes impossible to have a sane relationship with them.
Some Cuban women will go to the extent of using sex as a weapon. They will deny their partners sex if things don’t go their way or if they lose an argument, have to do something they don’t like or even when their partner refuses to do something or does not agree with her. It is commonplace and it is a form of emotional blackmail.
I thought it would be interesting to offer my view on this machismo behavior in a matriarchal society.